So, I recently got out of a long-term relationship. I’m struggling, but no one really seems to understand why. I’m not really coping with the loss. I’m fully aware that it was for the best. I’m more dealing with the life changes. I’m not sad, I’m confused. In the course of a couple of days and a single decision, my outlook on life and my two year plan completely changed. My life has literally been turned upside down.
He was Prince Charming when I met him. He was fun to be around, amazingly thoughtful, so considerate, and incredibly sensitive. Yeah, yeah, I know they’re amazing when you meet them. But we were perfect. HE was perfect. The first year was bliss. In the second week we were dating, I knew I’d met the one. He was everything I’d ever wanted and he only kept getting better. We went out on dates and he surprised me with two dozen roses “just because”. There were so many things like that. But the temper began to emerge.
Marines are a force to be reckoned with. They’re scary guys when they need to be. That’s why they protect our country. They are a special breed that is very difficult to live with, but if you can put up with them, they’re the most loyal people you’ll ever know. They are protective and honest, but they have massive issues. Some have more issues than others and no two Marines seem to have the same set of issues. Anger was his. How could the sweetest man on the planet be showering me with love one minute and scaring the fire out of me the next?
I stuck around for almost two years, making excuses and thinking and praying that things would get better. I think he finally realized I was going to leave him and he started to shape up at the very end, but it was too little too late. At that point, there was too much poison in our relationship for it to ever be removed. So I made the right choice and I jumped ship before we could grow to hate each other. We are on very good terms, which is nice sometimes but it’s very tough at other times.
He picked out a ring. We were basically engaged. We broke up. My other half is gone. I’m not getting married. I literally don’t know what to do with myself. I don’t know how to feel or how to act or what to spend my time on. Guy friends are coming to me and telling me they’ve liked me for so long and that they want to date me, but I’m numb. I don’t feel anything. I don’t believe in love anymore. I don’t believe I’ll get married anymore. I’m not being a cynic and I’m not bitter, I just don’t know how two people can love each other so fiercely but they still can’t make it work.
My sister introduced me to a man that was so handsome he looked like he belonged on the cover of GQ. We hit it off and hung out four or five times. Things were going really well at first, but he started to back off drastically. After the last night we hung out, he just stopped texting me or calling me all together. After just having broken up with someone, I was actually freaking out. I know we didn’t have some fantastic relationship with so much work put into it, but I wondered what went wrong. We were casually spending some time together. We had fun. I thought I might like him a little. So what happened?
I spent a week going over everything in my head. Did I text him too often? Was I annoying? Was I too whatever or not enough something? I drove myself crazy. I’m new to the dating scene and I’m rusty on all the techniques. I came to find out through a backdoor third party that he is just a commitment-phobe. That made me laugh. Who in their right mind would think that a girl that just got out of a long-term, very serious relationship would be seeking another one less than two months later? No sir. I was only looking to live a little and to experience life. I want to meet people, make friends, enjoy what’s left of my college experience, and make some memories. I’m moving across the country next year. I’m not looking for a white picket fence with some guy I just met. Starting anything at this point is futile.
So after days of freaking myself out and wondering what I did wrong, I came to find out it wasn’t me at all. I came to find out he is a goofball and he just missing out because he won’t just talk to me about everything. SO I suppose this is just a couple of words of advice for all the single men out there. Don’t run before you know what she’s after! She might just be looking for a good time that you just gave up on. Communication is key.